Stories
I’m standing on the deck of my home in the ancient forest of the ‘Tzitzikamma’;
From below we appeared as a shooting star for a moment as the dragon accelerated toward the outer skin of the atmosphere. Its pace did not feel quickened at all in the time and space that we inhabited at that moment. I knew we were moving fast by the way Formosa suddenly grew minute and vanished. We popped out of the ethereal blue black meniscus of our planet’s bubble and seemed to be floating, but for the stars and planets rushing past. The stars shon in all directions which surprised me. We usually only see the light pin pricking towards us…
Soon we were drifting above the outward spiralling galaxy below, and could see the swirls of many other gathered light bodies in the distance. I soon realised that we were moving to-wards a very dark place. Here the fervour of the blackness pressed against our skins and we were no longer being moved by our own propulsion but rather lured along by a force outside of ourselves. This magnetic pull gathered momentum at a gradient that was continuous and indescribable….
I felt a tinge of fear quicken my heart, but was soon reassured by the dragon, who was glow-ing with joy and utterly in its element – (literally!!). Light from other galaxies receded in a slow motion flash and soon we were surrounded only by darkness ….
A thick palpable blackness roared throughout our senses in an expression that they could not interpret. We were travelling way beyond the speed of light and it suddenly dawns on me that we could be moving at the speed of dark. And at this speed, you cant feel anything. We cant feel ourselves at all. I’m vaguely afraid that we have become the dark and that all traces of light energy has been furtively stolen from us. The silence is almost deafening; wide and voluptuous. A great vacuous aching womb.
Soon it feels like we’ve been there forever. That we are forever. The unfathomable depth of forever and infinite blackness. Zero point. So peaceful. Immutably expansive. A sensorium of nothingness.
The dragon and I have merged into the matrix of darkness that ultimately holds all that is light. Yet there is no light here. A holographic weave that connects everything. Yet we are most definitely nowhere. Perhaps this is how God feels, and its great.
As we descend into the vacancy of eternity, I become aware of a faint throb; its low languid rhythm almost undetectable. I realise that I’m really listening, perhaps for the first time in my life. And as I listen, I hear, and realise that pulse is as familiar as my own heartbeat. Yet I’d never heard it before. It’s clear, and constant now. I’m tuned into it effortlessly. It’s the heartbeat of all the universes combined. The gentle ripple that connects everything and nothing. The impulse of creation itself. I closed my eyes and blissfully surrendered to listening to the low hum of essential dark living matter; within forever.
Then the dragon stirred and i knew that it was time to return. The universe breathed out and we were back over Formosa. We’d experienced one breath only, in a place where time does not exist. An ephemeral instant beyond eternity. I noticed again, how the dragon glistened as the mountain did, and thought of how rocks and stones work as hard as stars do, to be what they are.
In bed later that night, I listened and heard the heartbeat of the universe united with my own. The brilliance of darkness living within. Oh but to ride on the breath of our maker.